I don’t think I’ll ever recover

We had to euthanize my best friend this week and I don’t think I’ll ever recover from it. I’ve had her since I was 8 years old. Everyday as a child I’d beg my parents for a dog and once I had her I never wanted to let go. For a very very long time she was all I had and all I had to look forward to when waking up and coming home everyday.

She was always there when I had nobody and I don’t think most people understand that bond. The hardest part is she still had so much left in her if it wasn’t for her brain tumor. She was 15 and a half but still was so incredibly strong, able-bodied, and full of zoomies.

I hate thinking about my future self and thinking “wow it’s been __ years since I’ve seen Buttercup.” I never want to forget how soft she was, how smart she was, her bark, her smell, her silliness, and her cuddles.